HOW TO INTERVIEW POTENTIAL ADOPTERS
Interviewing people who want your babies is REALLY hard to do. When I first started rescuing, I would get such stage fright that I had to ask a friend to do the interviews for me. How do you talk to strangers about adoption? How do you know what to ask, and what their answers mean? How do you know if someone's GOOD?
It took me a long time to get good at interviewing and to understand people and their intentions, and to learn who to trust with my tiny catties. Now I do lots of interviews for other people who have found kittens and want to make sure they choose good homes for them. I always tell people that your heart is your best friend--trust your instincts. Here are a few transcripts of online interviews I've had recently with potential adopters and my notes on them. I also talk by phone and in person before I give someone a cat--the whole shebang.
#1: A golden find. She ended up adopting!
--Hi Danni, i saw in the tiny pet rescue group that your cat had kittens, i was wondering if they would be up for adoption
++hi,
they are kittens i rescued from the animal shelter (that's how i get all my kittens), and they will be for adoption in a month! are you interested?
--I am, let me know
++great!! let's start by talking here on messenger, do a bit of an interview this way, to start. so tell me a bit about yourself, your experience with pets, etc :) Always start with a written interview to have as a hard reference for later
--Well i have 3 rescued cats. The first one was guefilte, i got her because she was hanging around a pet store in herzeliya. She came to me in a period of depression and I wouldn't had made it out without her. I was an ola hadasha, and she has give a lesson of strength. I love her, whenever i feel week i just have to give a look of her, she us an awesome being. My second rescued cat is cyrus, i call him cyrus the great ( for the founder of democracy) i got him thru rita and amy ( he was also from the shelters about to be put down) now he is cyrus king of the sofa, hunter of birds( if they are around) he is so fat. My third rescue was willow, she is cyrus girlfriend, they enjoy cuddles and grooming. Willow came to me during a shift at the town gyn and pool where i used to work as a secretary. I found her covered with diarreha and being 3 weeks old. I took her in our house thinking she would die any moment and i just wanted to give her the best life i could. She survived and now she is a year and a half fluff. Our fourth rescued kitten didnt have such a happy ending. I found her in a trash bag in the bus station at hedera. I got her home, she was healthy, willows best friend btw. I found her when she was 3 weeks old. They got a connection. Unfortunate, and very sad, after having Luna ( RIP)spayed she got sick and after a few 3 days passed away. According to our vet she was born with feline distemper, and the surgery triggered out the virus. She had the best 7 months ever, fetching, getting pet an cuddling. I cry for her a lot , this happened at the beginning of the month, and ill lovr
And ill love her forever. However... I always favor people who rescue and care for their pets until the end, and who talk about lost ones with such emotion. However, be wary of people who have just lost a pet, are traumatized, and want an immediate replacement they are likely to reject (it cannot replace their lost baby!)
++oooff i'm sorry about Luna....
--We still know we can take care of 4 cats and love them. So even when Luna its gone we can not denny this loving space to someone else wow...
++your family sounds so sweet...you are a lot like i am! i also credit them with keeping me alive
wow..you sound great
--thanks!
++what will happen if you move out of the country, to another apartment or something? Always question #1, especially with olim, who are likely to return to their home countries
--I was already in that position when i was only with gufilte. I only have a few counsins here in israel and they wouldnt take me with the cat at a moment i was homeless. I said fuck them. My guefilte cat gave me all the strength my family didnt give me in early years of aliya. If moving out of the country means leaving my puddie puddies behind there is no way im doing that. They thought me strenght once, they can do it again
++good for you :) standing behind your babies!
i would sooner live under a bridge with my zoo than leave them behind
--sends photo of really happy looking cat
++is that gefilte?
fatty!
--Yea thats my fat fatty cyrus
hah
He loves cheese to much
you think they'll all be ok with the addition of a tiny new baby? Knows there is a chance the introduction will be difficult. People can freak out when their pets don't accept a new baby and then bring them back in a panic.
ps my babies are the best in the world :)
++sweet photo!
where are you from?
--The last one is luna
Im from venezuela
That is willow and cyrus because they are lovers
++that moustache!!!!
i've met so many venezuelan olim lately!
so if you go back to venezuela, the 4 babies will go with you? Same question again, but directed
--I wouldnt go back to Venezuela if it wouldnt be so. Out of subject Venezuelan shitty political situstion would not be fix in a matter of years, my mother is planning of making aliya so im not leaving in the near future. And if that is the case I am Not going any way without my kitties. I am a proud crazy cat lady. My cats means everything to me. Yes i have a relationship, yes i have a job ( i am a guide for the mentally ill) i have studies, i am a psychologist. However being alone in a country i found myself with no one but my cat. And even luna left a huge spot to fill, there are out some kitties who need it
I want to give them a chance. Like i gave luna when i pick her up from the trash
I love my cats, they are my family I would never leave them behind Proves her commitment!
++you sound great :)
is there any reason you might part with them? maybe a new boyfriend who is allergic? a new baby? I always propose the most likely abandonment scenarios, without feeding them the answers I'm looking for. Give them the chance to mess up and say, "I'd find a new home for the cat."
--I consider pets part of the family, i dont see a reason to part from them.
They feel the same way we do. So they deserve to be treated with the same respect. You wouldt do that to a kid why do it to a cat
++and do you spay/neuter and vaccinate all your cats? Essential. I won't give cats to people who don't spay/neuter. The whole point is to stop the cycle of reproduction and to end over-population. Some cultures and religions forbid sterilization...make sure you know the potential adopter's stance on the issue.
--Yes
++great! and you don't get upset when they break things, scratch, jump on the table, etc? Cats are so annoying! Are they ok with it?
i'm sure the answer is no, but have you ever given a pet away? Again...
--I dont care they go on the table, if they braek something, i do get annoyed but is not like they do it unporpuse, like babies, when they brake something you can get annoyed but they didnt do it to be evil, accidents happen. I have never given a pet away
And the scratching its all a matter of teaching, if they know how to use the scratching post and they like it there is no need for them to go to the couch and scratch
++ok! and your boyfriend is also ok with getting a new addition? Don't forget to ask. Pets need to be approved by ALL members of the family. I always meet all the adults (and kids, if possible..they can be aggressive toward kittens!) in the house before I give away a cat.
--He was the one who suggested it first
++i like him already :)
which one of you will be the actual adopter? the one who will keep the catty forever, no matter what? Hard to ask this--it feels undiplomatic. But it is essential that you ask and get an answer, for your sake, the cat's sake, and the adopter's sake. So many couples take pets together and then realize that neither partner wants to keep them when when they break up someday...
--Me
Lets say worse case scenario that we al not together anymore i keep the cats. I dont think we are going towards that bad end anyways. We love each other very much and think a lot about the future
++do you want to come to my house and meet the babies? they're still very small, and you'll have to make sure you are very clean so they don't catch anything Only invite who you have already approved, and make sure they don't bring in diseases and bacteria that can kill babies
--I think i can pass by on this friday, any other day its difficult cuz i work in hedera and live in zichron. But i let you know before. I do want to meet them
Where in tel aviv are u?
++in the old north
before you visit, make sure you don't pet street cats
--Ok
How old are they now?
I wanted to know if it happens that we want to take one on friday is it possible? Im asking because we live in zichron and have no car, so going to tel aviv is not that easy. We do have experience taking care of kittens from 3 weeks old
++they wont be able to go to their new homes for almost a month-they are much too young
i can't give them away so young--it risks their lives No way. I keep them until they are strong and well-socialized enough to be safely on their own in a new environment. People who insist on having teeny tiny babies get sent away--if they can't understand that tiny babies may die, they are not actually so concerned about their pets
--I got all my cats when they where between 3-4 weeks old. They are now 4yo, 2yo and 1and a half yo. I know how to take care of young kittens. House is never alone, when im out my boyfriend is in and vise versa. The more time it passes they get more attach to each other, the environment, caregivers and the more difficult is for to adapt to a new place with 3 other new cats. If i wouldnt know how to take care of it i wouldnt even be suggesting it. I just want you to know you have someone here who really wants to adopt one of them, love it and take care of it. However going to tel aviv to visit before i can adopt it cost me more than 100₪ per visit and that is money i rather to use for it shots and food good, nice, but no
++I can't give them away before they are old enough to be resistant to infection, etc. i've rescued hundreds of kittens and know how quickly they can go downhill in the first two months of their lives--i don't want do give any away too early and have them end in tragedy. even a very strong kitten can die within hours when exposed to an antigen it is not prepared to fight. i've seen it happen way too many times... two months is the earliest i can give them away and be relatively sure that they are safe. no responsible or knowledgable rescuers will gave away kittens before this cut-off. i hope you understand! you also don't have to come meet them first--if you want to wait until they are ready to go, you can! you can even put one on-hold if you fall in love with one on the facebook page and can commit.
at two months, they have absolutely no trouble adapting, and are still tiny. don't worry.
--I rather to meet them, i dont think its fair just to choose one just out of the pictures ( they are all cute) and i know at two month they are still tiny hahaha, that wasnt a worry. Just let me know when they are ready so i can go great! she understood and didn't insist. perfect.
ps we control the hours the cats are outside. They only are allowed to be outside if me or my boyfriend are home in the hours that there is not much activity outside. Willow even prefers the inside and can have the door open and stay inside
Cyrus is fat and we like him to go outside excersice but all he does is lying down on the sun rad
++cats are the best!
--They are, too bad they are under appreciated. I dont like when people say they dont like cats because they are to independent, thats a big misconception, if they grow in a nice lovable environment they can be as sweet as any dog
I never ask you, who are the girls and who are the females? Cyrus its very difficult with other male cats, so we where thinking about one of the girls
++the girls are __ and ___!
--So, my boyfriend fall in love with ___
++ooofff she is so cute!!!!
you'll love her so much in real life...do you want to "put her on hold", or meet her and then decide? Don't put on hold unless you are totally confident in the people, WANT to give them a cat, and if the adoption date is not far off so that you don't get stuck with a kitten that is too old to rehome if they flake. An over-age baby then takes the spot of another rescue. In this case, I tacitly approved the adoption without meeting her face-to-face because I understood she was perfect
--Put her on hold. My boyfriend really liked her on the pictures
I have a question, when the time to get her comes, how are we doing it? Is it possible to meet on some middle ground or have to go to tel aviv?
++ok! i will :)
i like for people to come to my house to pick up. also, i might not have told you that the adoption fee is 150NIS, and that that comes with shots People come to me. It shows their commitment. An adoption fee keeps your rescue viable, and deters people who don't think animals are worth the investment
--Same cocktail vets give right? Do i get something that say she already got those shots so i can give it ti my vet?
++yep! the merubat (all-in-one). it comes with a certificate.
--Ok, no problem then
++did you see the new pictures i've put up? the kittens are so gorgeous :)
--Yes, just saw them. Mama cat looks so protective, its cute
++haha smile emoticon that's not mama cat--that's my kitten, piggy! she's adopted them
they're all orphans
--Awwww she is awesome
When baby luna came home willow also adopted her. She has been so sad since she passed. She has maternal instincts,
she's the absolute best
++oohh sweet willow! she can take care of the new baby :) YESSSSS...my baby will be well received by the others!
--Yes
They all are sweet. When my mom cane to visit from venezuela said that she doesnt know what whe do with our cats, but they are the sweetest she has ever met
++yay!!!!!!
maybe when she makes aliyah, she can take a pair from me, too <3 might as well try ;)
--She is planning on making aliya in about 6 months. But she will be coming with 2 dogs
++yay mom!! bringing her doggies!! sounds like the whole family is perfect for pets
so exciting :)
--Yes :)
++maybe she and her mutts will want a cat as an aliyah gift wink emoticon
--There are so many abandoned cats that you can see they really belonged to someone. There is one i feed at hedera bus station that i would love to take home, but since it is an adult male im afraid cyrus wont like him and i would have to put him out in a place he doesnt know. At least at the bus station he gets food and i visit him every day
He runs towards me every time he sees me
++i know. it's so depressing. and it makes me distrust people knowing that so many are likely to abandon, but i do absolutely everything i can to try to find the people i think are the best and most reliable, committed animal lovers to take my babies....but i worry about them endlessly... a bit of psychology
i'm so happy you take care of the bus stop cat.... encourage caring behavior
ps there are at least 5 people who have started this interview for __ and then never contacted me again.
--Well then in a way even when is frustrating they havent write to you anymore should be also reliving because it means they really didnt want them Dead-on. This girl gets everything
++it is relieving. there's a reason why i make my interview long and annoying--it's to get rid of people who are unfit So prepare!! My commitment is to these tiny babies...I take their futures very seriously!
This interview ended in an adoption I am 100% comfortable and happy with!
#2 This one was a "no" from the start
--היי שמי קרן ןאני מאוד מעונינת בגורים
הטל שלי _______ תודה ושבוע טוב
"Hi I'm Keren and I really want a kitten my number is _______ thanks and have a good week" No punctuation and the command to call her are already tip-offs that she's an unlikely fit (doesn't seem like much, but I've noticed behavioral patterns after hundreds of these interviews)
++Hi Keren! For now, we'll have to chat on FB. tell me..have you had pets? what is your experience with animals? thanks :) danni Keep her here and get in on paper
--היה לי חתול ואני מחפשת כבר הרבה זמן כי אני מעונינת רק בשתי גורים קטנים עבור הילדים שלי תודה
"I had a cat and I've been looking for a new one for a long time because I only want two little kittens to give to my kids thanks" Hasty, incomplete, irrelevant response. She's not serious.
++you want two kittens? and what happened to the cat you had? Waiting for bad news. Always ask about previous pets and their eventual fates
--היה לי את חותל שנתיים אבל לצערי הוא חלה במחלת גזזת שה פטריה חמורה בעור והבת שלי היתה אז בת שלוש והוא הדביק אותה והיא היתה צריכה לקבל טיפול מיוחד וגם גזרנו לה את שיער הרופא אמר לי אז שאני חייבת למסור את חתול אז נתתי אותו בלב כבד כי מאוד אהבנו אותו לעמותה וכמובן שדאגתי שידאגו לו שיטפלו בו מיצי היה חלק מאיתנו
"I had a cat for two years but unfortunately he got sick with severe ringworm and my daughter was three and she got it and i had to cut her hair and give her a special treatment the doctor told me that i had to give the cat away so with a heavy heart I gave him to an organization and of course I made sure they took care of him Mitzi was part of the family" Whew!! That was a mouthful! Not even the time for a single period? And the "doctor said to give the cat away", so she did? Instead of finding a more reasonable and responsible solution? Ringworm is treatable. No, thanks. Bye
++the vet told you to give the cat away?? and you did?? The End. She wrote to me again after a month saying "hi I want two kittens can I". I didn't answer.
#3: Pretty good, but had some reservations.
--Heyyy I want !!!!!!
Ahhhh they look soo cute This is a very young person, so I'm preparing age-relevant questions
++ :) they are awesomely cute :)
have you had pets before? tell me about yourself a bit!
--Of course ive had
++do you have any now? what happened with your last pets?
--I have 2 cats now
Ive had a 2 dogs
One for 11 years then died ...then one for 12 years then died.....(take in count that i took tgem in older) I loveee petsssss She understands that pets are forever--she came up with this without prompting, which is a good sign
Heyyy
We really want a baby kitten who is "we"? She was using "I" til now. look for confusing/conflicting statements that might tip you off to hoarders, etc. Also, since I see her FB and see that she is a young girl seemingly living at home, I know I will have to talk to her parents, too
We will take great care of it
++wow! you sound nice :) is "we" you and your family? who are you talking about? who will be the permanent "owner"?
--Me
++ok, but who is "we"? get your answers
--Me and my famiky
But i will be the one responsible
++ok! what will happen when you move out? have you gone to the army /college/india trip yet? When teenagers leave home, "their" cats are suddenly in limbo. many parents aren't willing to keep "the kids'" pets and the cat ends up in a shelter. After high school, Israeli kids go to mandatory army service and then typically take a year or so to tour the world (commonly south-east Asia) if they don't go straight to college. Find out where this young person is on the timeline, and what comes next
--Im after the army
Im going to college next year im renting with people and I made sure I can bring a pet!!!!
Im not traveling any time soon great!!
++you already checked with the people you'll live with and the landlord to make sure a pet is ok? and if you do decide to travel, or it's hard to keep the cat for some reason, what will you do?
i saw your original post saying you were looking for a cat for your little brother Not everyone thinks about landlords and roommates, and then show up with a cat who is not welcome. Ask about the person's back-up in case he should go on the India trip after college or if things get rough. Kids can't see their futures (neither can grown-ups, but at least they are more stable) and might need mom/dad's help at some point. And if she's moving out and the cat will be here, why is it suddenly for her little brother? I'm kinda confused, and she might be, too
--Hey yes I did check because i wanted a pet from the get go....if I plan to travel which I dont my family will be more then happy to takecare of it as you saw my little brotger loves animals...i wanted to get tge cat and me getting the cat will fulfill my brothers dream weird answer...will need to check with parents if I decide she can have the kitten
++have you talked to mom and dad about it? you're not just assuming they'd help you if you needed? are you sure that non of the people you plan on living with is allergic? and if someone turns out to be allergic what will you do? what if you get a boyfriend who doesn't like cats or is allergic? these are all very common troubles that cat owners face, and i try to understand how secure a cat's home will be...i want to know that my babies go to 100% committed and permanent homes, because they can live 20 years and that requires a VERY SERIOUS commitment on the part of an adopter Give common scenarios that can lead to abandonment and tell her that cats can be a 20-year commitment (some people don't know that)
--First of all yes I have !!!my parents love animals and I hace no plans of traveling for long term and if I will the can will come witg me....its family!!!its like a new kid !!!if you fly for a little the parents can watch him but if its long ill take him....
Cat is family
No question
++ok, great! so you're prepared to take the new baby with you, even as your life chages? new apartments, new homes, new countries, new family...all those things will happen to your in the next 20 years :0) and your new friend should be your constant companion! the catty might get sick or lost and will require money and care..it's not always easy...are you prepared for that? they break things, pee on things, scratch things, bite people, steal your food, etc ;) More scenarios that can turn people off to cat ownership or lead to abandonment
--Yea I am !!! I work i know what the value of money is and I have high high respect for animals ....im a vegetarian if that says anything ....I think a lot of people think that if you have an animal that you dont get along with after a while or you cant "afford you get rid of it ...I DISAGREE an animal is part of the family just like you dont gwt rid of someone from the family...you learn to deal with it...as I said Danni ...Ive had pets in my life im very very responsible She understands she's getting a few extra "young person" questions and knows my concern, and is trying to reassure me, which is good. The "i am vegetarian" remark is actually a bit of a turn-off to me, since some people use it as a badge of honor or cop-out, even though it ultimately has nothing to do with their commitment to their pets
++i know you are responsible and vegetarian is great! :) but i need to ask a whole lot of questions in order to make sure i don't accidentally give one of my tiny babies to someone who will not love and protect him forever..there are lots of people out there who think pets are disposable :( i try to understand who those people are
so, bear with me...
--I understand 100%!!! great :)
Go for it
great :)
Ask away
++ok. so
--I Have nothing to hide and I think your doing a great thing and this is how it should be done
++thanks! the cat will need to be vaccinated and spayed/neutered by 5 months. you up to it?
--Yea...1500 shek She's prepared to spend money, and will be happy when i tell her it's way less than 1500 shekels to get everything done
++1st year's shots, btw, come with the adoption fee, but you need to bring the kitten to the tlv shelter to get them
1500?
what's 1500?
--Fitst year of vaccinations
++noooo....
shots are free (you need 2 in the first year, and then once every year after that for about 80 shek)
spaying/neutering you can do through my vet for a few hundred.
--Oh...
++and my adoption fee is 150
--I thought its more ( and Iwas ok with that)
++Sounds great!!
ok :) so save that money for food, litter, and any kind of emergencies :) I decided she's a good candidate and will invite her over
--Dw
I work
++your total for med stuff this year (assuming nothing goes wrong) will be 150 (adoption) + a few hundred for spaying/neutering (a girl ais a bit more expensive than a boy)
the highest quality dry food will be about 50shek a month
, maybe a bit more
--I searched it up
I know
Plus toys
And getting him cleaned
And a bed
++everything is a toy for a cat .. no need to buy them
your bed=his bed
--Hahah i know
++cats clean themselves
--I wamt to cuddle with the cat if it lets me
++my cats are usually super cuddly :))) i rasie them by hand and they gets lots of love
--And yayaya...i give a lot of love
And love petting an cuddling with them
++the other thing you should know is that a babycat who is suddenly on his own can get weird sometimes. i usually recommend that people take two--it's much better for the cats because they always have company that way and do not become unsocialized, nervous or bored Very important to let people know in advance that 2 is better than 1, for many reasons
--I do plan on extending " the family..... but one kid" at a time so each gets ajusted well
++it is much MUCH harder to introduce an adult cat to a new one. the best is to take two siblings right at the beginning
otherwise it can even be impossible to get a second
--I have lots of friends that have done it though
When I say lots I mean like 5 -6
++and lots of people who adopt single kittens contact me when those kitts reach about 7-8 months to ask for freinds becasuw their singles are bored or destructive
--So I might do that...
++think about it..it works out much better for you and the cat Don't push, but offer
--Get one now and then in a couple of months get another
++and you can leave for a few days at a time and not feel bad--just leave food and water, and know they have each other. peace of mind is invaluable
--Because the min I get a cat its mine for lifeeeeee I want to gibe it all the cate and love it deservws
Care
I want to start off with one cat
++ok! your call. that's my best advice
--Ok I will think about it!!!
++cool :)
--So...how do we move on from here
++ok...more thinking questions..
--Ok
Come at me ;)
++if you have a baby, and that baby pulls the cat's tail, and the cat scratches the baby...what do you do?
--Omggg!!!!! I eont be mad at the cat !!!!ill be very very mad at my baby and try to teach it necer to do it again!!! ( it was the cats reflex) When i was a kid i had a dog that i took for a walk and one of my nabores pulled his tail so my dog bit her and I was sooo soo mad at her (the nabor) not the dog
ok!
++you get a new bed, and your cat thinks it's a scratching post. are you ok with it?
--Nope...ill have to get something to put around my bed so it doesnt reuin the bed...plus get the cat a stand that it can scratch
(Im honest
ok :)
++you get a bunch of groceries and plants...cat rips all the bags apart and knocks over teh plants and eats them.
--Ill laugh a bit....then learn for the next time to unpack right away and make a face (and talk to the cat as funnu as that sounds .. sayi g not to touch it
++haha ok :)
you want to sleep, and your cat wants to play. he screams for a whole hour and bites your toes.
--Ill play with him
No question
++not at 4:00am you won't
but you won't get mad?
--Just like if a baby wakes you up becaue he is hungey
You have to do it
No ...why would I get mad
++ok :)
--Or ill cuddle with him to bed
++now...will you live on the ground floor in your new place? will it have a mirpeset? if the cat will be allowed out, is it a safe place to do so? check out the new digs
--I have a house now...and as of my new place its ground floor with a garden
And yes its safe
++great! fun :) the baby can't go out until after it's been spayed/neutered/vaccinated though (at about age 5 months)
--I know ...
++cool
umm
if there's (god forbid) and emergency and you need to rush the cat in, can you? will you? can you afford it?
--Yes
If its an emergency i will cab the cat anywhere
++ok, so ur prepared
--I dont think you understood how much this cat will be like a wchild
Lol
++i am starting to understand :))
you must be like me
i live for these little fuzzies
--100%%%
haha ok
++now...is there annnnyyyything you can think of that might keep you from providing a lifetime of love and care? any reason you might change your mind or give the baby away?
--Absolutely notttt i thought allot before deciding that I want a kitten. ..
Dont worry
++totally a million percent?
it's really more of a personality question than anything
obviously you dont know where life will take you
--Yes when I start with something I stick with it
Sk anyone who knows me
Whatever I do I do all the way
++ok. so...you want a kitten ;)?
--And I ha e too much of a heart to ever ever lwave these kittens
YESSSSS
++ok!
so.
they are still too small to leave my house, but want to go meet them and put one (or two) on hold?
--Yesssss
++they'll be adoptable near the end of the month
--!!!!! Cute :)
I WOULD LOVE TOOO
Ahhhhh
++ok!
awesome :))
--When could I come?
She ended up finding a nursing kitten and adopting him instead
#4 Dude's not serious
This is the transcript of my conversation with a TPR member who was conducting her first adoption interview, for a kitten she had recently found. She wanted my help in deciding if the dude was good or not. He was NOT.
++...Looks totally normal (in his FB profile). Ask lots about the future--he's South African. Will he bring the fluff with him? Who will be the owner? He has a girlfriend--they can't share ownership. Looks like he has a dog--ask about it. Ask about past pets, find out what happened to his African pets when he came here. Stuff like that. Stress the 20-year commitment thing.
--Should I ask these questions via phone call or message?
++Whichever. Messenger is good bc it gives u a record of the convo and also gives people chances to turn off and disappear. Phone calls are good cuz u can hear tone of voice and judge truthfulness/reactions. I usually start with messenger, and, if the person is eligible, talk on the phone. Most people won't make it past "is he still available" by chat, unfortunately...
--But it won't freak him out with all this interrogation?
++?? Why would it? People who are serious about adopting are happy to be interviewed. If they don't have the patience, they aren't serious.
--Cool. So all those questions above you said to ask should be asked in one message?
Sorry for bothering u so much!
++One conversation. Look at the blog and u'll see.
--I'm usually receiving animals, not finding homes. It scares me to think I might give him to someone not serious.
++U want interaction. The "crazy" interview I do REALLY isn't, and is perfect for getting rid of jerks.
--He says he has a new kitten and wants a playmate for her.
++90% of people have 2 seconds of interest. ...Ok! So get started on questions. Past, present, future behavior and intentions. Ask abt the pinscher on his fb posts.
--Ok bye. Rude. And straight up says he won't commit to caring for the kitten for its whole lifetime.
Welcome to rescue :/ Sounds like this guy's a real sweetheart.
++Actually he is sounding very very into it.
--What was that really nasty screenshot about then??
++I know! But sometimes the words are taken differently. His female is called Tootsie like mine!!! I think that was either mockery or a simple off-the-cuff invention.
--How? Differently? Send me the whole convo.
++He has said he wants to get them fixed at my vet.
--And where was the kitten in the video? And why does Lior look so miserable? I'm very confused. She wants my kitten and puts on THAT face?? It's a face that could curdle a lemon (or whatever the saying is). And proud parents pick up the baby to show off, especially if it's the subject of the discussion/video. This tiny thing is left in its box. All subtle clues, but to me they're important.
++Hahahaha u picked up on the same stuff as me. Maybe she just has that face.
--That isn't the kitten's real name. He just made it up. Didn't u hear him ask, "Lior, what's this cat's name? (in Hebrew)" And then stutter? Can u send me the screen shots?
++Now it sounds strange. I can find someone better than this. It's too weird for me.
--I don't like him at all. Zero like. Not. Dude is very flippant about the whole thing. And you don't just show up with a kitten at a random vet and ask for it to be fixed. He is clueless and not taking any of it very seriously.
++Nor me.
--Bye bye.
++Yep agreed. So I'll tell him no. The family looking after gingy right now said no pressure to me.
--Just dont answer. Let it go. He won't care.
++K cool ur the best. But I seriously need to find someone soon 😞 I am not good at this. ugh.
--Don't stress. He'll get the home he deserves. And maybe the foster fam will keep him anyway--happens a lot.
++They don't even like cats haha and they are lovin on him. So sweeeet.
--U just got a good intro to interviewing. See how I knew from the start that he was no good? Practice.
++Amazing. It's a scary business.
--Stay cool and in control. Dont freak or throw kittens around.
++Yeah I always want to see the best in people.
--Keep this little guy safe. I always find people I love. Be skeptical. U need to be.
++:)))) Will do! You are a great teacher.
--There's no reason to rush--rescue right, or don't rescue at all. That's what I say.
++Very true.
--Good luck! Keep sending me stuff for review if u want.
++Thanks so much.
--No prob...Few things: never apologize for asking questions. There's nothing to be sorry about. U have something they want, and it's a tiny helpless creature. U want to maintain the upper hand, stay in control, demand respect and keep baby safe. Also, the first rude comment is the end. Done. No kitten. Don't give the benefit of the doubt or possible interpretations. Nice to me: kitten. Asshole: fuck off. Also, never tell anyone about deadlines or needing to "get rid of" cats. Again, maintain control. Be cool.
++You are so right.
--Last thing: the guy talks in stupid slang. It's careless and disrespectful. He can't have ur pet if he can't speak like a gentleman. It's all related (attitude and pet care). Might sound judgmental, but this a business, and you're dealing in lives. Adoption is a big deal, and I treat the adoption of my kittens as a privilege. I have a few minutes to form opinions of people and my judgments can mean life or death for the kittens in my care. I don't let potential adopters make me feel bad for asking questions or for being picky or insistent, and I don't forgive bad interviews (just like a job interviewer won't give you a job even though your answers were all wrong.) UPDATE ON THIS STORY: The guy took home ("saved", in his words) a tiny puppy a week later, and then one week after that dumped both the kitten and the puppy online in order to get a different cat. I got a big Thank You for keeping the girl's kitten out of his hands by interpreting the interview for her!
#5 Dude's a total jerk
I always look at profiles before talking to people. You can tell a lot from them. This guy's was an immediate turnoff: 23 years old, entire page was full of pictures of himself trying to be a model. American-Israeli. No smiles, arrogance oozing from him, different slutty-looking girl in each photo. In his first post-army job and apartment. I already assumed he was a "no" before we started our interview.
++Hey i would love to come and get one of those cuties
--Tell me a bit about yourself :)
++How old r they Doesnt address my first question.
--2.5-3 mos
++23 years old living in bialik with roomate looking for a cat
--Which of you is looking to adopt?
++I think the black
Need to see them: Doesnt address my second question.
--First i interview
++Cool
--Who will be the one adopting/owning?
++Me.
--Ok. Have you had pets before? What were their stories?
++Had a cat and dogs abd the story is that i lived from the north That's not a story. Guy isn't being too cooperative here, and definitely not trying to impress me or get on my good side.
--? Where are the cats and dogs now?
What is north?
++North of state
At.my family's
--Were the cats and dogs that are now At your family's YOURS that you left there, or family pets? Try to find out if he's someone who adopts/leaves with mom/replaces. Lots of young peope do this when they move out, assuming mom and dad will take the new ones, too.
++My family
--And will this be the first pet you adopt On your own? (So exciting!)
++Hehe not really
--What else, and where are they? You're still young
--Lol i live by my self
They at the north where they have garden
++? You said you have a roommate? What garden? Who are they with?
--In zfat
++And are they always in the garden, or Indoor/outdoor?
--And yes i do have roomate
++I love tsfat :)
--Indoor
++With...? Your family?
++I'm trying to get it straight. U said they were family pets and not your own. So you had your own, and left them there when you moved to tlv?
--Yeah...
++Ok Great. Why didnt you take them with u?
--Cant take care of the dog.. and the cat is an old boy^^ Fair enough. Left them where they are happy, at home.
++Are they happy with your parents? Have they always lived there with them?
(I do have reasons for all these questions btw )
--Yes they do Do what??? AHHHH
++You mean happy and been there their whole Lives?
--Since i found them
++Got it .. were they street babies?
--Si. In tsfat u pick them only from the street
++Good :) Will your parents keep them forever?
--I hope so
++Ur Not sure? What if they don't want them anymore?
--I joke dont worry Funny
++Ok good. Thanks. What about a new pet..what will you do with it if you want to travel to india for the year or something? Israeli 23 year olds are usually planning their big trips around the world.
--Give it.to my sis. And i had my trip, dont Worry Does sis know? And what does "give" mean? Permanent? Temporary?
++Give and take back? Does she know this? :p
And what about college..new adventures..where will the cat go?
--Ofc she's my sis Not of course. How can assume his sister will want his cat? And can't he answer my bloody questions?
++?
Of course what?
--She will take care
++What's up next for you? College? Work? Go abroad? Move in with girlfriend? Asking AGAIN
And where is your sis? Is she older? Does she know she's the designated carer? and AGAIN
--Yes hun my sis is 29 living in ramat gan. I work for the us embassy. Not planing to go no where Don't call me hun. Answer my questions. I'm getting annoyed.
++Ok, but if you do make a big change (i've been your age and know life can change a ton) will cat come with, go somewhere else, what will be the plan?
--Take him
++Even to another country?
--In that case he will stay at my sis. Abd im not goin any where. Ok? So...not take him. And why is little guy getting so defensive?
++What if you find a new girlfriend who hates or is allergic to cats? Reference: 100000 fb photos with different slutty-looking girls.
--U got more silly Qa? Breaking point. He hasn't made an attempt to answer anything in a way that might help me understand why I should give him a kitten, and now he's insulting me.
++Sorry. We can quit if it's silly. I've been in rescue for years and have reasons for My silly qa. Trust me, i do. I have no problem being rude back to people. I won't be bullied in to giving my babies up.
--Abd what if i die tomorrow
I dont have a gf
And dont plan to get one thank u. I only see this type of arrogant, snotty response from boys his age.
++It always cracks me Up how mad some guys your age get when i ask them questions. It's not THAT HARD to understand why people interview before they give living creatures to complete strangers. Anyway, thanks anyway!
--U have stupid qeustion. What if and what if.. FU
++That's how it goes, dude. Those are the questions. If there weren't Stupid people doing stupid things to pets, i wouldn't Have to ask. Anyway, sorry! Shabbat shalom
--Like ur the only one in the world who ever raised a cat Double FU
THE END.
#6 Weirdo
The profile was very strange--all his friends were half-naked Russian girls, and all his photos were really weird new-age graphics and computer-generated rainbow eyeballs.
--אני מעוניין לאמץ גורי חתולים I'm interested in adopting kittens Kittens? Plural? No one has ever said "kittens" to me. Maybe "a pair of kittens", but not just "kittens".
++יופי! אתא יחול להשבירלי קצת מי אתא, etc? (excuse my really bad Hebrew spelling ;P) Nice! Can you tell me a bit about yourself?
--אני תושב רעננה I live in Ra/anana Uhhh...That's all?
++אוקיי.. יש לך אוד ב״ח? היו לך? Ok..Do you have other pets? Have you in the past?
--היו לי בעבר I had them
++ו..? מה קרה לחם? And..? What happened to them?
--הם גדלו והכל היה בסדר They grew and everything was fine Uhhh...weird?
++שליח...נדבר מחר שאני הולחת לישון אחשיו? Sorry...can we talk tomorrow? I'm about to go to bed. Luckily, it was 12:30am and I could use this escape. I didn't expect him to remind me about it the next day, and I was right--he didn't even answer me. PLEASE DON'T throw your kittens at just any old shmo who says he wants them!!
No answer. THE END.
#7 Intimidator
The interview was ho-hum for a few questions, then the girl got all crazy on me.
--Hi Danni! I heard from Lindsey that you often know of cats and kittens looking for new homes
Do you currently have any?
++Hi! Yes, i always have kittens i've rescued. what are you looking for?
--one thats already trained to be clean inside, and also hopefully has had the main shots
++Have you had cats before? Find out about past pets. Is this a new immigrant who left "old" pets behind?
--Yes all my life back home in Norway And finally I live in an apartment that I am allowed to have a cat in Israel, ground floor. So he/she can also go outside and in our yard
++Oh cool! Did you make aliyah? What will you do with the cat if you eventually Leave israel?
--Yes I did. I am not leaving anytime soon, but if I do I will forsure take him with me
++Cool! Welcome
--Maybe give him to my dad that lives on a kibbutz if it will be complicated but I dont think so and it would be impossible for me to give up an animal Enter Dad on the Kibbutz. She's already thought that he'll save her if need be. What is "complicated"? For some people, it is just the desire to once again be cat-less. Try to figure out what her limits are.
++So if you go back to norway, you will bring him?
--Yes! So maybe "complicated" is a high threshold. Ok...hope it's true.
++Cool. Did you have pets that you left in norway when you came here?
--I grew up on a farm so we always had animals but my mum still lives there and has our cat still 12 years going strong
++Oh nice! Are you prepared to take care of a baby for 15-20 years? No matter what?
--Forsure.
++What if you fall in love with a guy who is allergic or hates cats? One of the main reasons immigrant girls here give away their pets....
--Hehe I am already in love with the best guy ever and we both want a cat equally as much It will be the perfect third citizen of our new place that we can shower with love and attention
++Nice but what if...?
--It wont happen. I dont think its necessary to even think about but if worst would come to worst id have to give him to my dad that lives on a kibbutz and love cats Dad. He IS an out.
++So you would consider choosing the boy over the catty? Does dad know he might be getting a new pet at some point in the future? Dad might be tired of getting his kids' old pets and say "no".
--Of course, I could not be with someone who does not like cats. And also my dad loves cats. He just adopted one and changed his screensaver from his son to the cat haha My kind of guy ;)
++Nice... What if you or someone else in the family develops an allergy or is scared of the cat? I'm thinking of an eventual child Threw in a so-not-even-a-concern: the Fearful Child
--Well I could not give away my child, so I guess the cat would have to go to my dad. Anyway no one in my fam has any allergies and I am legit a nice person. I would never leave a cat or throw it back to the streets. I feed them myself and would not have the heart DAD. And that means cat goes to Dad in the case of Fearful Child, too? She didn't answer that part, so I assume the answer is "yes". It's great that she so trusts her dad to step in, but I worry that she'll rely on him too easily and that he might not be such a willing cat host... Also, when someone calls himself a "nice" or "good" person, I automatically start to worry. I'm sure she's as nice and good as she assumes and claims to be, but I want her to be willing to prove it to me.
++So if the child were afraid, the cat would go to dad? Of course you can't give away a kid
Would you consider giving the kid antihistamines?
--Of course Again, unclear/contradictory answer. She just said cat goes to dad in these cases.
++I'm trying to understand--would you do everything possible to keep the cat forever? How willingly would you pass it on to dad? And what if in 15 years from now dad doesnt want a new cat? I'm starting to get annoyed that we can't get past this question...
--Sorry but I am at work and I do not have the time to answer 1000 questions. I am responsible, more than the average person and I would never give away an animal that i brought home to take care for. I get way too attached. But I feel like I need to prove myself which I think is unfair. You could ask anyone of my friends and they would tell you exactly how I am. All I want to do is to take care and give love to an animal. But if you dont believe me I will be able to find a cat from the street that does not ask any of these questions and just wants a loving home without being so suspicious The Attack. She contacted me on a Friday afternoon...if she's at work, she shouldn't have written to start a conversation. It's not my fault, and I won't feel bad about having questions to ask. I'm clearly not going to interview her friends, so she needs to bear with me.
++It's not about suspicion at all--i try to understand the people i am giving cats to, since many are not going to commit or be good owners, and i want good homes for my babies. It's ok if you don't want to answer questions, but i don't know you personally. It's ok. Thanks anyway! Shabbat shalom The Explanation and Exit. I don't need to convince her to stay on the line with me. It's not that hard to understand why people ask questions before they give animals away to strangers--seriously!
--When someone gives someone who is drowning a helping hand, you should take it. I dont think I look or am an irresponsible person at all and I think its sad that you are so defensive but whatever. Thanks alot. The Barb. She thinks she's doing me a favor, that I'm pathetic or helpless. She thinks she's saving me from something. What a bitch. I didn't even reply.
The End. Moral of the story: do your complete interview. Get answers that satisfy you, read between the lines, and don't apologise for asking. Never be intimidated in to giving an animal away! I've had the rare few try to bully me in to giving them kittens, but it doesn't work on me.
#8: YES!!!!!!!
--Hi, how looks the procedure of adoption? Could You tell me something more about Pip? Our beloved Mister Fu passed before Pesah and we are lonley.. I dont know if for my husband this is not too early, so for now I just ask, but I think I fell in love with Pip. Best regards, Chana
Could we see him? I already like her. She write with full sentences, attention to detail, and an emotional appeal. It is a very personal and polite approach, including her signed name and Pip's name twice, which already makes me like and trust her.
++Hi Chana, sorry about Mister Fu. The adoption means doing an interview first and then coming to meet Pip. The good news for your husband is that he is still too small to go to his new home, so you can come meet him and then have a month to prepare your hearts and minds for his arrival at your home. Tell them about the wait and see if they are willing.
--Thank You for answer! Yes, we know that we need to wait a month - it is ok. I spoke with husband and we want to meet Pip. We are ready for interview also. Mister Fu always is in our hearts but life without cat is incomplete. They are true animal lovers. And she spoke to her husband about Pip already--many people forget that part and hope to deal with it later.
++Oh good! So he's ok with getting a new baby? Excellent. can we chat a bit later, maybe tonight? I agree with you---i couldn't live without pets for a second.
--Yes, sure we can
++Awesome. Let's plan on about 9:00...just write me a message when you guys are free! Always put the ball in their court. If they remember to contact me in a few hours, they pass the test. I never promise to initiate anything. Remember that this entire process is a test of their commitment.
--Ok, no problem at 9.00.
--Hi, we are here (at EXACTLY 9:00! I'm amazed. This girl rocks!)
++Ok great want to talk by chat or phone?
--We can write I actually prefer this, because then I have a permanent record of the conversation.
++Ok! Ready for lots of questions? Give them another chance to bail.
--Yes!
++Cool. So tell me a bit about yourselves and your history with pets
--Our Mister Fu was a black cat - rescued by my husband, he was the only one of the brothers and sisters. She put in details she knew I knew were relevant. She knows how to rescue, which I like.
++How long was he with you? Was he from israel? I can see on her profile that she is Polish, so I want to see if Mr. Fu came with them to Israel, which indicates a lot about their commitment to their pets.
--who were drowned. WHAAAAA? This is what backward people do to this day with unwanted puppies and kittens. I see and hear tons of stories. My dad told me the workers did it on his property growing up in New York, too.
++What??!!! Why!??? omg
--Fu was with us 18 years
++Wow. Long life!
--It was in Poland in the big town - Lodz.
++Shit. Do people drown kittens there? So glad he found Fu
--it was somethink terrible . Normal people do not behave in this way.
++God...
--We took Fu from Poland to Israel - he was our family.
++In america they used to do it on farms. My Dad told me...Wow. What a story. And he must have been a special cat. Pip is also the only survivor of his litter
--Yes - he was the one
++I tried to save his brother Squeak, but he was too weak. I have a black cat too :))) Manpants
--It was many procedures and bureaucracy, medical tests but we did it! I read about little Squeak They know what travelling with pets means, and are ok with it.
++Anyway, if you eventually leave israel again, what will you do with Pip? I know it can be a hassle
Poor Squeak it was the worst
--wow We love black cats! But now it is time for new colour.. black is still conected with Fu..
of course!
++I know what u mean
--We never would leave our cat.
++So he would go with you wherever you went? Even in the case of quarantine and beaurocratic nonsense?
--I do not understand people who say - I'm leaving - take my cat - wrrrr. Yes
++Ok, awesome.
--Our cat is part of our llife! Like with Fu
++I don't either...i wouldn't leave if i couldnt take my pets--that simple!
What if you wanted to move to a nice big house on the beach that didnt allow cats?
--It was not easy - tickets for fly, permission from vet form Poland, form Israel, permission form air lines, dates , moving , all in connection with Fu
No way
When we were looking flats (3 movings) in Israel - just like that, where you can have pets.
++I know--i have to do it when i fly with my dog (she's come with me everywhere on earth)
So no question that you'd give up searching for a great place that took cats and just give Pip to a friend? Again, this is the expat plague--"adopting" (in quotes, since really adopting doesn't allow for dumping) and then dumping.
--So we stayed at the TLV half a year - there we found an apartment.
++Wow! Good for you you're very loyal!
--Family is family. Once we were without Fu - 5 days in Prague (Fu at home with our friend). Holidays were hopeless, because we just missed him.
Next time he go with us Rad.
++Hehe it's like talking to myself! What would you do if you had a child who was allergic or afraid?
--He liked to travel. Sweet Fu. Allergies can be treated. If the child is born with a cat - little chance for allergies.
++All very true. Good. But if one develops (i suddenly became allergic at age 16), will you cope by getting meds, etc?
--We have friends here - Yaron has a cat allergy . But Niuta lives with family and there is no problem - now theyhave a 4 year old girl and the boy half-year old.
++And they cope?
--Yes, they cope - without problems. Now we have so good meds..
++True! And there's also a brand new vaccine that fixes the allergy!
--O, good to know
++If Pip gets very sick, will you pay the big vet bills and give him the treatments he might need?
--Yes - like we did with Fu.. ;( He was in the hospital 4 days..Treatment..meds..everythink what was needed..We were then in the bad financial condition - but we paid for everything
++Poor buddycat
--kidneys..
++Ok.. I'm glad you managed...kidneys are such a problem in cats. I know.. Bring up kidneys. I try to if they don't. They are a very common problem for older cats and a lot of people will have to treat chronic renal failure with fluids. See if they're ready for that.
++If Pip gets bored, sad or lonely from being the only cat, might you get him a friend? Some kittens don't do well on their own
--Fu was very healty! So young! He looked like a kitten and not like a cat who is 18 years old.. Another cat this is important decision. For now we are ready for 1 cat. But if it will be necessary for his health
++It is! But it needs to be considered..pip is now a single baby and seems to be doing very well, but he might develop bad habits later on if he doesnt get the attention and playtime/cuddling he needs
--Yes we know
++I have lots of people come to me for second kittens. If it's necessary later, we can add a baby to your collection. Are you guys home a lot?
--Fu not like other animals - he liked to be king.
++Heh lots of cats are like that
--That is why we only had Fu
++Pip is very gentle by nature. Not dominant or aggressive at all (so far)
--This is the good time for a new baby kitten - i work at home
++Oh good!! He can sit in your lap all day then!
--I love that!
++He does too. And your husband is as excited and ready as you are for a new baby?
--Our prince had his favorite time for cuddling...Yes - we both want
++Oh good you'll love Pip. He's really awesome. He'll be an indoor cat? Or at least mostly?
--We started to adopt a cat from Poland - cat that no one wanted. But now he is sick and must be treated.
++Ooof you were going to bring him here but now he's sick? Poor baby Wow. These are seriously good people.
--We can be in Poland only for a few days in august and we must decided about
++Will he be ok if you dont adopt him?
--resignation. But hi found a home now!
We are so happy!
++He did? Yay!!! Ok!! So i think i understand that you are the type of people i like to give my babies to want to come meet Pip?!
--We know that there is someone who also loved it . So we thought about what is good for him
++I wish all cats had homes!
--But it was hard decision
++I bet
--Yeeeeee We want to come and meet Pip
++Ok! So what are you waiting for?
--Can we come on wednesday evening ?
++Yep perfect. Is there a time that works for you?
--I must warn you - we are religious. do not be afraid
++Haha not sure what i'd be afraid of. But it's sad that u feel you should warn me On this note: don't be prejudiced. I give pets to whomever proves themselves eligible and good. I don't care if they're purple or have 6 eyes. There are lots of people who won't give pets to religious people, etc. There are special questions you ask for certain groups, though. Know what they are. Below are a few of the questions to ask religious Jewish people.
--My husband is at work till 16-17 and we are from Bene Beraq so we need about 1 hour to come to TLV - where you are? it was a joke
++On the religion thing--you are ok with neutering, right? I only give cats away to people who promise to neuter in time Religious question #1
--Yes - we are from Europe Sterilization is necessary for the health of our cat.
++And you will go to the vet on shabbat if it's necessary? Religious question #2
--Yes - we must!
++Ok great
--This is not a problem - we have good vet in Ramat Gan.
++Some religious people wont..they say only humans can get treatment on shabbat. Ok. So let me know on wednesday when you're on your way. I'll be here
--We can do everythink without money and taking a cat is not a problem in Israel ( everywhere eiruv )
++Ok! Good to know
--This is the main law - pikuah nefesh is only for humans, but
++But rules are made to be broken
--what kinde of human i'm if i can see how my cat hurt!
++Exactly! Ok, so call me on wed and tell me when to expect you! And plan on some major cuteness! Again--put the ball in their court. Many people will be no-shows, though I REALLY don't expect that from these people.
--When Fu passed away we were both with him to the end .. Vet said he had never seen orthodox crying like that.. Love is love... But we are happy to see Pip. Great!! We must bring somethink for him ?:)
++Nope! Just bring lots of hugs Make this fun for people. It's better for them, for you, and for the cat. Try to build nice relationships with adopters--it's important for the continued security of the cats you give them because it means you get to stay in the loop and step in if something goes wrong at some point.
--We can be about 19.00?
++Yep! That works
--We have a lots of hugs!!
++Hooray!
--Now we fear that we will liked by Pip. He is so cute!
++He likes everyone dont worry.. He might be nervous to be handled by strangers, but it means nothing. He's THE BEST
--We understand
++K. Prepare for cuteness time!
--So we have a first visit oooo..we are ready for all! 3 months without cat..
++I know!! You'll have to pet streeties for now
--exactly!! we feed them. What a hansom little boy!
++He loves kisses
--aaaaaaaaaaaaa...My husband is also crazy about him!
++U have good taste in kittens
--this is love :))))
++Ok... Gotta feed kittens now! See u soooooon
--See you Hugs for Pip!
++Hugs from Pip :)
--Yeeeey Thank you our prince
They came to visit Pip every week until adoption time :) I am so lucky to have found these people!!
#9: VERY GOOD TO MAKE THEM THINK IN MORE DEPTH
Very occasionally I will interview someone who will then realize it might not be a great idea to adopt after all. It can be someone I really like (as in this case), which is a total bummer, but I am very glad it happens BEFORE they actually take home new babies! Moral of the story: interview well!! For more reasons than one.
--Hi Danni. Thanks for chatting with me earlier. I think it was good you asked me all those questions because I started asking myself a lot of things that I hadn't thought about previously and I agree that it might not be the best idea right now to adopt. I really appreciate you taking the time and hope he goes to a great family ++Oh no!!! Really? --Afraid not. But I think it's good you ask those questions. ++Oofff what a bummer. Ok! Maybe later on.